Keyboard Wizard Gifts

'Your training will be the next five minutes watching my fingers move at the speed of light.'

"Piano Bar"

A Meeting of Computer Buffs.

"It's very easy to operate. The pointy end is enter, and the pink end is delete."

"Good morning - your neighbours have asked me to come and tune your piano."

"Let's see him get out of this sonata."

'So far he's self-taught but we thought it time to engage a regular teacher.'

I'm fast and efficient in the office and out...I can touch type and touch text!

STRIP Hambone: Escape key

Computer Music

"Today, you're going to spend less time breaking into the school back office website, redirecting air traffic, sending encrypted messages overseas...and more time working on the lesson."

Shorthand

Amplifying Information

Piano Recital

Pounding speeds up the computer.

"In the first place, it isn't "maddening crowd.' It's 'madding crowd.' "

'My penmanship has really improved since I got a laser printer.'

'Human Error .. Yet Again.'

Ed Flanders, Deconstruction Worker

Solicitor speaks legal jargon and has a translator who tells client: 'You haven't a hope!'

I will study my speling words...

"Bah, I could've written a better dénouement in my sleep."

"Bad dog! I've told you to always proofread."

Kid in class corrects teachers spelling.

"My novel is not a doorstop!"

Restaurant Francais: All you can pronounce £30.

Freind: 'Misspelled, anything helps.'

Miss, how do you spell "acceptable"? I've Googled every "e" and can't find it.

'Roget it's fantastic, superb, extraordinary...where on earth did you get the idea?'

"I know its hard to believe right now, Lawrence, but some day you'll thank me for asking you to punctuate your sentences correctly."

"He's sworn never to say Boudicca, ShrOwsbury, whoM, or narrative."

Conflating Science and Grammar. The boy threw the ball. What grammatical role does "ball" play in this sentence? An object in motion!

The Family Joules: Part 21

Ninedency: A budding tendency

"It's a play on words."