Programming Wizard Gifts

'When I registered for this class, in computer programming, nobody told me that it's all about converting caffeine into computer code.'

'I think I set the security level, on my anti virus software, too high. Whenever I access anything it is automatically deleted.'

He crash tests software.

Viruses are Going Around. Get Your Tech Vaccinated!

Pounding speeds up the computer.

Brian wanted to call the presentation "Synergy". Paula wanted to call it "Cooperation". They could never agree.

Hey, calm down --- Now, what did you say again?

'You'll have to take an online company aptitude test, but if you're the designer we're looking for, you've already designed an app for that.'

"Why do you need so many computers?" "One for billing, one for stock control, one for human resources, one for financial management..."

Wishing Well, Wishing Good.

Piano Recital

'Technically, I was making fun of your writing ability.'

'I have a homepage, therefore I am.'

"That? It's where I keep all my passwords."

'Upgrades? Yes, we've programmed it to excrete a few drops of water if it should lose a chess match. You know - tears.'

Deadline

Traffic Management Strategic Group

". . . so, all I really need to do is change one word."

'He will observe your text now...'

Gerald Ratner's return

"We're looking for an accountant who can use ChatGPT creatively."

"Tom's writing has been going really well! He's written over 200,000 words. Now he just needs to work out what order to put them in!"

Computer operator welding machine.

'Here comes the 64-bit local bus.'

Tech support...can I help you!

"Making us more mobile friendly didn't mean letting the general public use our car park, Smithers."

'I home-schooled all seven kids. Right now I'm in the teacher's lounge.'

'We'll talk later, Ed, but for now we have a quick and dirty solution to your objections.'

"I've got a great idea! By adding the words "and associates" to my business name, no one will every suspect I'm really just one person with a phone and a web site working out of my bedroom!"

"Reading social media, I almost miss grammar, spelling and punctuation"

"Do you have a link I can click on that removes me from all future conversations with you?"

Computer Music

This is Pandora, our new Content Manager.

'Your training will be the next five minutes watching my fingers move at the speed of light.'

'Yes, I'm very punctual. I always use commas and periods.'