Jump Aficionados Gifts

'The following have fees outstanding...'

Jazz quartet, piano, bass, sax and drums

"I'm not using my jumper as a goalpost, sir, I'm using it as a jumper."

Giraffe Portrait

Saxophonist playing on the map of Cornwall.

Extra Long-jump

'In a slight change to the programme, the second year jazz quartet aren't playing 'Hello Dolly'. They are however playing truant!'

'Mother will catch you!'

Sandra can you step in here a minute and lie on the floor? And bring a ramp.

Exclamation Marks chasing the Question Mark.

STRIP Golfer turned Javelin thrower

'Who says octopuses can't tango? We were doing great until I ate the trumpet player.'

'Let go of the pole!'

"Slithering is okay but jumping is more fun."

'I'm not taking any chances with the water jump this year.'

Jazzy Crossing: A group of jazz dancers cross the road at a Jazzy Crossing sign in a very Jazzy way

A bit pre festive isn't it?

"Hold on, one more thing to go."

It's over the hurdle not under...

"I wasn't texting or eating and there's no law saying I can't juggle."

Equestrian cheats by using a staircase instead of jumping over the jump.

'Jogging is a great exercise for a tit man!'

'Four million years and an amphibian crammed ashore and developed into homosapiens so I see no point whatsover to go back!'

'Remember I said I wish I had more arms so I could get more things done? Well the doctor took care of that problem.'

'Now, let's try a Waltz. Don't worry about me though, I'm wearing safety boots...'

'I'm going to take a wild guess and say 'dressage'.'

"He won't go any higher, he's got vertigo."

"No, I'm afraid that doesn't count."

'You gotta be kidding me!'

'I can see you have a drinking problem.'