Jogging Humorist Gifts

"We caught him exercising at a rest stop."

Man painting over a 'You are here' sign.

"Oh my gosh, honey! Look out!"

Banana Split...

'Which one of you told Glurk to stretch before running?'

Carrot in front of the donkey workout.

Jogging Bottoms

'Honestly, dear, I'm just giving my pedometer a rest.'

Tortoise and hare on treadmills.

"I hate this time of year."

'Looks like Shelia has overdone it with the cream scones this week!'

"If the meeting goes on for longer than scheuled...I'm prepared!"

'You sure complain a lot for someone who says he loves nature.'

'His 5 hour energy drink timed out. If only he had taken it 3 seconds later.'

"I'm thinking about letting myself get old."

'Geez, I hate these fun runs!'

'You wanted a speedy trial, so I'm sentencing you to a swift kick.'

LOOK BHIND U!

'I've met you before...I'm not good with names, but I never forget a pace!'

Hello-BUNS OF STEEL?

'The doctor is running a little late this morning; but a couple more laps around the park and he should be back at his desk.'

"Susan! The Johnson's dog is chasing me while I'm jogging again!"

Fork in the trail.

'Are we having fun yet?'

'I just know baby is getting as much out of this world trip as we are.'

'If you plan to run a half-marathon you won't want a stopwatch, you'll need a calendar!'

"Yes, I'm the wise man who lives on the top of the mountain. And believe me, the surcharge for the pizza delivery service is insane!"

"Oh I don't mind the jogging, but I think you tricked me. When you asked if I wanted to exercise, I thought you said, extra fries!"

'Fred, didn't I tell you to wear a helmet?'

"My doctor told me I should start working out."

'There are two types of cholesterol - the good type, then the one you've got.'

"I've been telling everyone how athletic you are."

False encouragement.

'It's going to be hard to get lost in these woods!'

'Look Dad - bigfoot!'