Jogging Humorist Pillows

Man painting over a 'You are here' sign.

"Oh my gosh, honey! Look out!"

Banana Split...

'Which one of you told Glurk to stretch before running?'

Carrot in front of the donkey workout.

Jogging Bottoms

'Honestly, dear, I'm just giving my pedometer a rest.'

'Looks like Shelia has overdone it with the cream scones this week!'

"If the meeting goes on for longer than scheuled...I'm prepared!"

"I hate this time of year."

'You sure complain a lot for someone who says he loves nature.'

"I'm thinking about letting myself get old."

'Geez, I hate these fun runs!'

LOOK BHIND U!

'You wanted a speedy trial, so I'm sentencing you to a swift kick.'

'I've met you before...I'm not good with names, but I never forget a pace!'

'The doctor is running a little late this morning; but a couple more laps around the park and he should be back at his desk.'

"Susan! The Johnson's dog is chasing me while I'm jogging again!"

Hello-BUNS OF STEEL?

Fork in the trail.

'Are we having fun yet?'

'I just know baby is getting as much out of this world trip as we are.'

'If you plan to run a half-marathon you won't want a stopwatch, you'll need a calendar!'

"Yes, I'm the wise man who lives on the top of the mountain. And believe me, the surcharge for the pizza delivery service is insane!"

"My doctor told me I should start working out."

"Oh I don't mind the jogging, but I think you tricked me. When you asked if I wanted to exercise, I thought you said, extra fries!"

"I've been telling everyone how athletic you are."

'There are two types of cholesterol - the good type, then the one you've got.'

'Fred, didn't I tell you to wear a helmet?'

False encouragement.

'Look Dad - bigfoot!'

'It's going to be hard to get lost in these woods!'

AL'S GYM, 'We're going to make a new man of you!' 'Will he have new credit cards?'