Ironic View Seeker Gifts

"It's not much of a view if you don't like bricks."

A woman floats in the pool under the shade of an airplane

Men looking at black screen, "I call it film noir"

'I feel like exercising. Have you seen my tennis shoes?'

"You are being overly-defensive again, Brenda!"

"It's about sex and revenge, except for a short chapter on the Continental Congress."

"It's a long way to Enlightenment. You might need some cash."

"In hindsight, we shouldn't have had him cremated."

'Well, you got the dog to protect you against criminals. Perhaps now you'll have to hire a criminal to protect you from the dog.'

"Admit it, we're lost."

"Of course it's not clean energy -- We don't have clean ANYTHING!"

Airplane Mode.

Artisan hot dog stand has pigs tethered to it.

"My service animal for Alzheimer's, sonny!"

"Wait, wait, back up, back up. Who the #!@! is George Orwell?"

"Most women find me too cutthroat."

Mort Park! You mean Killer. You're sprung, Killer. I'm free to go? Unless you're so tough now you'd rather stay. I mean a guy named Killer probably likes jail. Mail me my blanky.

Statue of Liberty from the Staten Island Ferry trip.

What do you think about this "too big to fail" stuff?

'Look, I said I'd bring you the report on micromanaging. Just give me a chance.'

"I hope someday someone steals my identity and makes something out of my life."

"Now then Mr Parker - are you relaxed?"

Site of new Super Gamblers Anonymous.

The Red Carpet

'Oh good! - I hate long lines!'

'I just evolved the opposable thumb, and I've already got carpal-tunnel syndrome!'

'You say you're having trouble seeing into the future'

'My horoscope said I would be taking a long trip today.'

Thanks to an elaborate system of mirrors, every employee at Vecon Industries had a window view.

"I suppose we could burst onto the literary scene."

"I hacked into Santa's computer and discovered we're not on his naughty list. I feel we're letting our generation down."

AI Summit

"All I see is more trees."

"I belong to that heroic little band of unemployed on whom a healthy economy depends."

'I'm glad you're making friends, Darrel.'