Ironic Gardener Gifts

Watering a plant in the rain.

Garden Centre/Water Shortage

Gardener clipping topiary stairs

Something Wilted This Way Comes.

An Unexpected Guest.

"No! I want to live! I want to live!"

'The attendant is very good. I tip him the occasional sparrow.'

'Gosh, I dunno. You sure it's organic?'

The Phantom Of The Garden

"There's got to be a better way to raise potatoes!"

'Ah, now's there's something different....'

'I'm in the amusingly shaped vegetables department.'

"The pea's the first vegetable I've ever grown. Can you stuff and mount it for me please?"

Planting Bird Seed.

"Here's the new smart plant...it tells you when you're overwatering it."

City Zoo: 'Try our exotic composts in your garden.'

"Why don't other people ever do this?"

"Gnomeschooling is harder than I thought!"

Wet weather footwear - shoes that are shaped like boats.

'You've never forgotten that Elsie Turner, have you George!'

'Every summer, dandelions can't wait to go topless!'

'Manure, you say? We always put custard on our rhubarb!'

"I stopped singing to my plants! I've never had one say 'shaddup!' before!"

'What on earth made you think of growing water melons in the bath Henry?'

Bonsai farms: 'We started growing normal trees, but it didn't work out!'

'Well Miss Pearson, this flood resistant GM Maize you've developed is pure genius. Giving it gills was a masterstroke'

With my home genetic engineering kit, I've created massive, politically active vegetables. From the left, a giant carrot. From the right, big broccoli. It was an accident, but something feels right. Introducing Meet the Produce. Next topic: Trump. Losing. Winning.

Clown watering his flowers.

Hipster Yard

"911?... Guinness Book of World Records?... 911?

Pyramid Garden

'Sewer farm - 100% organic'

Football fan

Man with a sunflower head watering flowers with human faces.

Woman Planting Flowers in her Snow Covered Garden.