Insurance Awareness Gifts

'Considering time, temperature, and your lack of health insurance, I wouldn't eat the deviled eggs.'

'Your bloodwork reveals a slightly worrisome health plan.'

Cyclist with Dollar Signs.

Hand Sanitizer Man, beloved superhero of every workplace in the world.

'I want to forewarn you that my HMO won't approve any treatment that uses a needle.'

Distance to avoid contagion

MEDICAL SCHOOL, 'I didn't know you COULD specialize in insurance.'

"Relax. At your age, it's common to have a nose hare now and then."

'Notice how with truth in packaging requirements all the labels begin with ‘OMG!''

'But he qualifies for medicare in dog years.'

'Pre-existing conditions - What did YOU die of?'

Obama Healthcare.

"For most people, the sense of panic will be mild."

'Frankly, our dental plan bites.'

'I'm sorry. It looks like your insurance company doesn't cover pre-existing life.'

"L.L. Bean slippers... $25.00 Ambulance ride to hospital... $500.00 X-rays of spine... $350.00 Three refills of hydrocodone... priceless!"

"Do Mr. Reaper, do you have health insurance?"

Coronavirus Global Alert

"You have a co-pay...two cookies and a glass of milk."

'After giving a recorded statement to these people, being grilled by 60 Minutes would seem like a piece of cake.'

'A 10M bonus for your thoughts.'

"This isn't helping my migraine."

"You'll be awake during the entire procedure. Your HMO won't cover the Anesthesia."

Vending machines with junk food: 'Zing!', 'Zoom!' and 'Crash!'

Centaur for Disease Control Says Wear a Mask

'The doctors all tell me that you have great medical insurance. They think your coverage might last through most of the tests that they have scheduled.'

"I have an exclusive license agreement with Pfizer Pharmaceutical."

'Your cat scan looks fine, your pet scan looks fine, your MRI looks fine, but your insurance reimbursement doesn't look fine.'

'The scariest story I know is escalating health care costs.'

The Woodstock Medical-Emergency Tent - 1994

"I'm prescribing a patch. It will dispense meds as permitted by your insurance company."

"They remove people who have become 'jammed in armchairs' due to COVID 19 lockdown!"

'The position carries no salary, just healthcare coverage.'

Mr Claus, tests indicate your blood is 95% milk and cookies.

Auto parts, Lite Puff Pastries, & Health Insurance Exchange.