Healthcare Awareness Gifts

"Do my medical benefits cover being sick of rising medical costs?"

'I couldn't afford the Bronze, Silver, or Gold health plan of the Affordable Health Care Act...'

"I work here because I need health insurance. I need health insurance because I work here."

'Sorry Jack, but as I said to Jill, it's the two tier system, if you can't afford anything better, it'll have to be just the vinegar and brown paper.'

"Oh, I'm sorry. That procedure isn't covered. Now, spin the wheel to see what you'll pay."

Love in the pandemic

I've got a headache. This pain pill ought to take are of it. I wouldn't do that, sir. Huh? Why not? No reason in particular. It's just not the best idea. Says who? Tim Johnson here. I work with the company that made that fine pill. We're recalling the drug after some recent studies showed side effects we missed in our initial research. What, like heart attack? Or exploding brain? Well, yes and yes, but very rarely. And there's something more. A potential side effect that is much worse. Lawsuit.

The epitaph on a headstone reads "Art Farkas - October 8, 2012 - I didn't even reach my deductible."

"Needles scare him."

Hand Sanitizer Man, beloved superhero of every workplace in the world.

Deaths from Coronavirus

10K Run: Smoker's Lane.

Distance to avoid contagion

"Relax. At your age, it's common to have a nose hare now and then."

"For most people, the sense of panic will be mild."

Coronavirus Global Alert

Centaur for Disease Control Says Wear a Mask

"I have an exclusive license agreement with Pfizer Pharmaceutical."

Vending machines with junk food: 'Zing!', 'Zoom!' and 'Crash!'

"This isn't helping my migraine."

The Woodstock Medical-Emergency Tent - 1994

Healthcare declaration

"They remove people who have become 'jammed in armchairs' due to COVID 19 lockdown!"

Mr Claus, tests indicate your blood is 95% milk and cookies.

Earth and the Coronavirus

'I cause sneezes.' 'I cause fever' 'I cause that 'I don't know- I just don't feel too good' feeling.'

'The good news is that it's not your fault.'

Getting to the ER saved my life...early retirement.

"May I offer you a side of life insurance?"

"Geoffrey's a bit worried about lyme disease."

'If we respect each other, contraception makes sense!'

"The cape comes off too."

'You're not retaining water. You're retaining cookies and ice cream and pizza...'

"Do you cover hypochondria?"

Scientific Research: 'Uh...why'd it take'em 20 yeahs t' figyah that out?'