Insomniac Supporter Gifts

"Damn! I STILL can't sleep!"

"Try thinking about something else."

'I never get a good night's sleep. Thank God for these office meetings!'

"Maybe we should have just had a baby..."

Your presentation will be terrific. I was up all night, but something's still missing. Here. I've got just what you need. How thoughtful! Eye concealer! No need to thank me.

Things that go beep in the night.

'So, ten thousand pounds could be yours if you call in and answer this question...Why the hell aren't you in bed?!'

The Uncle Vinnie Insomnia Open

"They say this will keep us up all night like that's a bad thing."

"It's only insomnia if there's nothing good on."

"Before I prescribe a sleeping pill, I'd like you to try the opera."

Thoughts of Stephen Harper...

"When Van Gogh had insomnia he created masterpieces."

Wide-awake.

"I'm going to give you something to help you sleep."

"They were known as the tribe that didn't sleep."

"Sleep? No, I'm the anxiety fairy. How about a cuppa joe?"

"I have no trouble falling asleep and I have no trouble waking up. I just need to switch when they happen."

"I had a dream that I was awake and trying to sleep and now I don't know what's going on."

"You up? You also couldn't sleep.."

When animal cloners suffer from insomnia.

"See how much better you look after a good nights sleep."

"This book put me to sleep—It was wonderful."

Gracie can't sleep by counting sheep so she sleeps by counting A+ grades.

'I hate to admit it, but I counted sheep all night.'

'Oh man, really shouldn't have had that coffee in June,'

"He's chasing his dreams."

"You've been daylighting, haven't you ?"

"Must you page swipe so loudly?"

'One will help you sleep like a log. The other one's to keep the termites away.'

Washington Had Insomnia Here.

Daily Promise...

I'd do anything for a good night's sleep. Well here's a $33,000 mattress. Hand-crafted layers of horsehair, cotton, flax and natural latex. What sucker would think overpriced horsehair would put them to sleep?! What's the number? Does health care cover it?

'The new baby? Oh he's great! I haven't slept in 4 days, but the baby is great!'

'Next time try decaf.'