Humorous Heartbreakers Gifts

'I love you, but I have to keep moving or I'll suffocate and die.'

"This is my new country song I wrote about my self-driving truck leaving me..."

"I met him on an online dating site. He was on their 'return' section."

Romance

Sexual chemistry set

Phoenix

Barman In Love.

'Have you forgotten, dear, that you gave your heart to me in nineteen ninety one?'

Brian the dog#3 - Brian now realised he was NOT man's best friend.

'It's hard finding a caring,sensitive and good looking man. Most of them already have boyfriends.'

Caterpillars in love

"Men just won't leave me alone!"

A dog with a heart shaped hole in his body

'She kept pinching the Vicar's bum!'

Surgeon Finds Heart Reading 'Be my Valentine'.

"Can we not fly in a "V"? Victor broke up with me."

"If we're to have a serious relationship Nigel, you must stop ringing my bell and running away."

'Two can't live as cheaply as one, but we will get double - occupancy rates when we travel'

Valentines

I know you can't forget, but you should learn to forgive...

Kissing Hands

Tunnel of Love - LGBT Friendly.

"I know you're a brain cell, but can't you act more like a heart cell?"

Especially for YOU! - Free Valentine hugs.

"When I first met him, he wanted to change the world for me. Now, I'm lucky if I can get him to change his underpants."

A heart flies out during an operation.

Love Mix Ups.

'Look pal, we're friends and all, but you need to get out more, meet some people...'

"This here is a little number I wrote when I recovered a repressed memory."

"Will you call me?"

"Help! Help! I've fallen and I can't get over my old girlfriend!"

"I'm detecting no heart at all...which explains your dislike of cute puppy videos."

Heart ailments

"Dear USPS - Julie Michael's mail is no longer in care of Apt. 8-B. She has moved out to Queens. Queens!! Can you believe it??? Three years I devoted to that woman! Oh, well. C'est la vie. I'll find someone else I suppose. Eventually. Yeah, right!"