Humorous Heartthrob Gifts

"If we're to have a serious relationship Nigel, you must stop ringing my bell and running away."

Sexual chemistry set

Cupid

"Feel my claw of death!"

Clown answers the door to a custard pie in the face.

'Due to our failure to secure a holiday-relief organisty, the next hymn will also be sung to the tune of Chopsticks.'

Daffodil bulbs

'Cycle shop' selling puncture repair kits next door to a 'Sex shop' selling inflatable dolls

Drunken singers in a public house

'Now that's what I call rejection.'

'Our sales have been uneven but our company has heart.'

"In mitigation, Sunny Chemicals would like to point out that prior to contracting his skin allergy, Mr Crumb was already ugly."

Surreal Ale Pub.

'Vacuums!'

'Well, I'll be...look at this...there's a song in his heart!'

'Doctor Corazon, I'm in love with you. You make my right ventricle go pitter-patter.'

"Listen, the first pterodactyl of spring."

'Hey, Lori! Take a look at Mr. Geckler's EKG!'

'Your left ventricle doesn't know what your right ventricle is doing.'

'...And for those of you who cant remember the words...'

"I bark and I bark and I bark, and yet, somehow, I'm still unhappy."

Just Survived My 3rd COVID Scare Dance.

'Two can't live as cheaply as one, but we will get double - occupancy rates when we travel'

'Any idea where my night vision visor is?'

"Could you put me 'on hold' Mom? I could use a hug."

"Tick, tick, tick..."

'Jill, come take a look at Mr. Bolinder's EKG!'

"I've forgotten your face but I remember your mask."

'Look pal, we're friends and all, but you need to get out more, meet some people...'

Love Mix Ups.

"Dude, don't say it..."

Especially for YOU! - Free Valentine hugs.

I was bitten by a radioactive bedbug – My superpower is getting a solid eight hours of sleep every night. Wow. So lucky.

Historic Medical Moments: The first time a body rejected a heart before it was transplanted.

'Very steamy and sexy novel, Miss Pendergast, but how come that this Latino heart throb only services women over 70?'