Humor-loving Chef Gifts

Escaping Egg

'I think the salmon is thoroughly smoked.'

'Mildred-thy milk runneth over!'

Soup of the month.

"That's it. We’re toast."

"You're lost. This is Mom's apple pie."

'I started out washing dishes, but when the dishwater tasted better than the soup...'

It turns out they don't go together so well,

"All the butter was gone. There was no way out. The puff pastry had to be made with margarine... from a tub."

'I used to think I was the only one kids hated... I don't know what I'd do if it weren't for you guys.'

'Dial 1-900-Fortune.'

'The Burrito King.'

"Waiter, can you heat this up? The wild salmon got cold while I was posting it to Instagram."

"No thanks, I'm stuffed."

"That’s a toaster. It’s a tanning bed for bread."

'Muriel's philosophy is that what happens in the kitchen, stays in the kitchen.'

'Hey, pal... do you have a wine that tastes like beer?'

"What do you suggest...the tuna fish or the peanut butter and jellyfish sandwich?"

"What happened to the thin crust guy I married?"

'The following programme contains scones of a sexual nature.'

Where Deviled Eggs come from

"Bottled, tap or toilet water?"

'If you order...You can digest it in...'

Amy Sedaris

Leftovers restaurant - for that unpretentious dining.

"The Knuckle Sandwich is good."

A Pirate Egg Prisoner about to Walk the Plank into a boiling pot of water

'Needs more kale.'

A sick sandwich is in the hospital and is getting a transfusion on new Maya and Zesty Mustard.

The Good Feud Guide - 'Delia Smith does a nice roasted Worrall-Thompson.'

"This IS a chicken fried steak!"

Gingerbread man sits at desk marked food editor

'No, we don't have any tuna FISH, but we do have salmon FISH, trout FISH, and catfish FISH.'

Luigi's Career Change From Pizza Shop Owner to Masseuse Goes Smoothly...