Hoof Hoarder Gifts

"She just loves them - she's a total girl horse."

Shoe addict.

"Of course it's alien abductions! How else would you explain the, 'November Phenomenon'?"

'Looks like somebody needs to lay off of the authentic angel food cake!'

"I always end up buying way more black-truffle honey than I intended."

'Yes, they were using it to clean up the graffiti!'

Festive squad

'Look, if we're going to make this business work, we need to stop eating all the stock.'

"I brought my worn out shoes because I heard that confession was good for the sole!"

I see you've caught my honey robber.'

"My father said I was too big for my britches!"

"Buckle up. We're in the midst of an unprecedented breadcrumb recession."

'Looks like they decided not to g south this winter.'

"Hi honey, do we need anything for the junk drawer?"

"I don't think you're getting the point of this exercise."

'Pay bills, stick to a budget, plan ahead.'

Amazon Prime Day ~ The Aftermath

'I hear he's lobbying for tax laws that will let him declare us his dependents.'

'Oh good, it looks like the few things I ordered from the catalogue have arrived.'

Were you aware, minion, that bees are dying off by the millions all over North America? No. Studies show it was caused by a certain type of pesticide that was introduced in the 1990s. A pesticide that nobody can prove was concocted by a young man in my - I mean, his - basement. Anyone who thought ahead and stocked an underground cavern with 50 tons of honey is going to clean up. Hypothetically speaking, of course. Very bad man.

Everyday is cyber Monday.

Bad News Headlines: War in Iraq...Largest Peace Time Deficit.

"I bet you couldn't eat three."

This isn't the magic top hat, either – I told you we were lost.

Recycling bins for glass, paper, metal and IDEAS.

Electronics. It's a great idea, but nobody makes campaign-canceling headphones.

"Aside from the hours of DVR'ed shows you have yet to watch, what else keeps you together?"

'Hey,COOL headphones buddy'

'Yes Ma'am, I do pick up unwanted hives.'

'I think I'll get out of the crazy stock market and invest in something secure, something like bee keeping.'

'He's so proud of his art collection.'

"You know what I want for our twentieth anniversary? A Dumpster."

"Hey, do I look like I'm made of honey?"

"I will not buy a fridge magnet. . ."

No Smoking sign next to a bee hive.