Ham Hoarder Gifts

Man with meat getting chased by dogs

'Looks like somebody needs to lay off of the authentic angel food cake!'

'Being stuck on a desert island is one thing, but being struck on a desert island with a hoarder...'

'Yes, they were using it to clean up the graffiti!'

"I always end up buying way more black-truffle honey than I intended."

Festive squad

"She just loves them - she's a total girl horse."

'Look, if we're going to make this business work, we need to stop eating all the stock.'

"Hi honey, do we need anything for the junk drawer?"

"My father said I was too big for my britches!"

I see you've caught my honey robber.'

"Buckle up. We're in the midst of an unprecedented breadcrumb recession."

'Looks like they decided not to g south this winter.'

James Russell Lowell

"I don't think you're getting the point of this exercise."

'Oh good, it looks like the few things I ordered from the catalogue have arrived.'

Amazon Prime Day ~ The Aftermath

'I hear he's lobbying for tax laws that will let him declare us his dependents.'

Everyday is cyber Monday.

Bad News Headlines: War in Iraq...Largest Peace Time Deficit.

'Still saving money to finish that nose job eh?'

"I bet you couldn't eat three."

Recycling bins for glass, paper, metal and IDEAS.

'I think I'll get out of the crazy stock market and invest in something secure, something like bee keeping.'

"Wait a minute - you're Ellie Pobursky, the famous handbag designer!"

'He's so proud of his art collection.'

'Yes Ma'am, I do pick up unwanted hives.'

"You know what I want for our twentieth anniversary? A Dumpster."

"I knew I shouldn't have given you the tickets!"

'The test-results are back... I'm afraid it's quite serious: You're allergic to pollen...'

No Smoking sign next to a bee hive.