Hollywood Scheduler Gifts

"For the best picture not having won anything thereby being eliminated from this category..."

Screenwriters pitch movie to studio boss: 'It's a reinterpretation of Bicycle Thieves, that classic of Italian neo-realism. We're calling it, Dude, Where's My Chopper?'

King Kong uses fly spray against the pesky planes on top of the Empire State Building

Please sit down. I can give you five minutes.

"Seth, here, is one of the best young creative compromisers in the business."

"I'm busy this afternoon, but I can crayon you in for Saturday."

Marilyn Monroe - Spot the Difference

'Who wants to work late again, raise your hands.'

Canadian film production

Danger Slow Sand.

"This just in... the country has adopted a 24 hr military clock... ...details at 23."

'Hey, Charlie, have we got good news for you!'

"I'm swamped but I can squeeze you in for a few moments yesterday."

'...And now, the film most criticized for eroding traditional family values, the nominees are...'

‘I've cleared the morning, but you've got bandits at twelve o'clock ...'

Enterpe, Terpsichore, Calliope, and Bernie, their agent.

"OK, stop me if you've never heard this before!"

'I sense we might be having a problem with our appointment scheduling.'

"Do I have many meetings today?"

Tom Hanks

"I can give you a little bit of focus on 2:53 next Thursday."

"Which part are you reading for?"

'For the actress who benefitted most by rehab...'

"Hey look, my To Do list! I haven't been able to find this for weeks!"

Hair Traffic control.

"Hello. I'm director Bob ('Blue Fires') Munsey and this is screenwriter Doris ('Highway to Nowhere') Winslow."

Los Angeles, 1928: Mickey Mouse Emerges from the Primordial Ooze.

'Harlow, why can't you be passionate like Mel Gibson?'

'Vital mission - movie parody'

God's Sticky Notes