Holistic Healer Critic Gifts

Alternative illnesses for alternative medicine.

Institute of Health next to Alternative medicine dept

'You've got, like, a Feng Shui problem with your pancreas, dude.'

New Age Store.

Proceed no further if chakras not aligned.

'Doctor, how much acupuncture experience DO you have?'

"Honey, why don’t you tell Tony and Karen about your microdosing-healing-group thingy or whatever the heck it is?"

"Looks like your Yang is on the move again."

If all else falls...Mom's Chicken Soup

"I've never seen Tia Carmen so excited about a grand opening."

Transcend Dental Medication: "Prepare to let go of the pain."

Alternative Medicine.

Extreme Naturopathic Medicine.

The New Age Dentist.

Acupuncture clinic

"Preparing for another day nursing?"

'Some of you may have heard that Dr. Weil is giving HIS talk right now in the next auditorium.'

Man to other coming out of Alternative Health Club: 'I had total joint replacement - they switched me from hemp to medical marijuana.'

'Let me handle this. I'm an orthopedic specialist.'

Doctor with Teddy - "Take this. It will help you sleep."

'It's anxiety. Don't worry, vitamin B happy.'

'He touched you and you can walk again? I just got an illegible prescription.'

"And if Ooh, Eeh, Ooh Ah Ah doesn't work, we'll try Walla Walla Bing Bang."

'And so, Ladies and Germs, I conclude that we must promote homeopathy! This may be our best chance to wipe out the human race since the glory days of the Black Plague.'

"Tell you what, dude, I'm writing you a prescription for a scented candle and some granola."

Connect This, Woo-Woos

Dancing Doctor

'How optimistic are you about the future?'

Alternative medicine

Chicken soup is in an intravenous drip.

'I hope this alternative Chinese medicine works!'

"I understand he's in aroma therapy.''

"Your life line is a little weak, but we can fix that."

"The amethyst has calming properties – which is great when you’re out of Xanax."

Right, like you're the first shrink to recommend aromatherapy.