Hockey Humor Fans Gifts

Penalty Box. Shouldn't there also be a "reward" box? I've been nice most of the game!

"Good game, good game, nice game, namaste, good game, nice game ..."

The best goalie in the world!

Ok, ok, maybe you guys are right - maybe I do have a concussion.

'Here we go again...'

Pole Vault Rules

"Fancy dyeing your hair white so everyone could see it was you who played a shocker!"

'We've conducted a chemical analysis of the beef in hot dogs, and we've determined, Mr Ruth, you are guilty of steroid enhancement.'

'When you said, Dream Team, I thought you meant the Swiss Bikini Team.'

The Real March of the Penguins.

'Don't get up. ... I've got it!'

Golfers forming the raising the flag on Iwo Jima.

Dating The Daughter Of A Hockey Goalie

"Listen, I've had 25 fights and won all but 24 of them."

'...And Timmy, as usual, will guard goal.'

Captain Ahab and Moby Dick in Retirement

"Cricket...six minutes of excitement crammed into six hours!"

'...And remember' It's not whether your dads win or lose the fight in the stands. It's how you play the game.'

'New rule. From now on you don't just sit in the penalty box. You also get a root canal.'

'In this...um...part of the circle...'

'The Ref gave out 4 yellow cards, 2 reds and 7 Valentine cards.'

'Will you lean on the other post for awhile, please?.'

Dominique Valera - The King/Cat

Always keep your eyes on the ball, Tigers!! Why? I never get to play. Crack. Whack! Any other questions? Will this get me out of practice?

Jack Nicholas - Sun-Visor

"Oh, come on ref. How can you not see that?!"

"Hang on, I think we've got a Ring Ding here."

"This one is called 'Essence of Hockey Bag.'"

The only drug this league tests positive for is Geritol.

'Listen,kid, you're going to have to lower your standards if you ever want to throw the sleazeball.'

'Let's practice lobs again.'

'Oh, dude. Maybe the electronics store has a, throws like a little girl return policy.'

'I'm so embarrassed I'll never be able to hold up my head again.'

'Oh, great. Leonard's got quarterback on his jersey. No amount of bleach is going to get THAT out.'

Old basketball players never die. . . they just pick and roll.