Hockey Hero Gifts

'I don't know what gets into me around the holidays.'

Ice Hockey

'Lungs, normal. Heart, normal. Kidneys, normal. For the life of me, I can't figure out where your pain is coming... wait. Do you play hockey?'

"The defense rests"

'Now remember, keep your head up ...that's only a temporary brain in there.'

You look like a team player. I like that!

Goalie Wall.

"My kid needs new hockey equipment."

"As your advertising agency I recommend a cow as a mascot for you hockey team. Because cows do not have upper teeth."

T-Rex: the Best Hockey Goalie

"This is a tough hockey league. I'm just the team's webmaster."

'I do a lot of icing. It's part of my mellowness.'

I love hockey!

Zdeno Chara

Kids playing ice hockey for a medal.

Mat Trick

Canadian Jesus

"Break his third chakra!" "Knock the dharma out of him!"

Use the body brush vigorously - he will enjoy it.

"Good game, good game, nice game, namaste, good game, nice game ..."

"You must be the newly qualified driver."

Lanes Closed for the Hell of It

The Leafs win the Cup!

I love Basketball.

Yeah, I've been driving in circles for an hour looking for a place to park. Zamboni.

Where the Deer and the Antelope Play...

"My name is Leonard, and I'll be your auto mechanic for today."

Goodenow & Bettman: We have a deal Bob! But do we have any fans left?

The Real March of the Penguins.

'He migrates through every year about this time. Just sits there and watches. We leave him alone and he leaves us alone...'

Say speed

Make up your mind. Next exit 500 miles.

Watering the garden in the rain.

'Overruled, you may continue.'

Dating The Daughter Of A Hockey Goalie