Heavenly Umpire Cheer Gifts

Man on death bed, hand in clouds through window like umpires, 'The final out'

"He's got great velocity but his trajectory needs work."

"This ump is so good he doesn't even blink."

"Have you tried barking at the moon?"

Baseball pitch with a sign saying 'No Left Turn.'

Jumping cheerleaders

But does he dust anything at our home? Noooo

'I hate it when they emulate their major league heroes.'

'...I don't like your chances!'

'The only thing exciting about these games is our dads fighting with the umpire.'

'You can't beat the excitement of a new county season.'

Cricket widow's revenge 2

I can just feel it. I know they're talking about me.

Get back in that locker room! Go on - scat! ... Anyone else forget to wash his hands?'

"Compromise? What the hell is there between safe and out?"

'That was a flagrant misconduct of the left hand.'

"I warned you about putting funny stuff on the ball, Flanagan."

'Are referees black with white stripes or white with black stripes?'

'How's that, Umpire?'

Isn't there something about this in th Geneva Convention

College of Referee Training: 'Congratulations, you failed your eye test abysmally!'

Baseball.

You promised you wouldn't bring work home with you!

Balk? Balk! Balk! Balk! Balk! Balk! Balk! Balk! Balk! Balk! Balk! Balk! Balk!

Some Cricket Novelties.

'Balk!'

"I've got dominion, I've got dominion..."

'Steeee-rike three!'

'Out. How come?' - 'Off side.'

"Your Honor, I have a rebuttal witness."

What would happen if Shakespeare lived centuries later and tried being a baseball umpire? Out, damned spot! Out, I say! Can you explain the infield fly rule. It is madness yet there is method in it! What's in a name? A rose by any other name would hit as sweet! Fair is foul, and foul is fair. You should stick to writing.

'Give us another minute, blue. The surgeon just reattached the tendon and he's closing up.'

Referee cop.

'Me? Argue? ...No, sir! That was an excellent call.'

The public was right