Hauntings Gifts

'If we had any guts we'd get out of here!'

"Alright, kids. Who wants to hear a scary living story?"

if only i could figure out how this thing works

'It's only the library ghost - he was a great poet but a failed novelist.'

'When we bought this place we thought we'd only be making wine. Apparently, we're also into spirits.'

The spirit in the wall would go on and ond, but Alvin never let it bother him.

"To be honest, I don't believe in ghosts."

"Excuse me, do you folks believe in ghosts?"

"Sure, we serve spirits here."

'The ghost walks this passage every night Monday to Friday. He has weekends off.'

'Alone for the weekend at last!'

Ghost School.

Out To Lurch

"Can't you do something more creative than messing around with cupboard doors?"

Barcode Dreams

"I'll be a little late. I'm working a double shift."

"Had more ghost-hunters 'round my place last night....scared the daylights outta me!"

"It's not the paranormal activity that bothers me so much as the passive aggression."

"And this Halloween, try not to make a specter of yourself."

"Really? That's the only game in this house?"

"Sweetie, I'm back from the dead!"

Open House of Horrors

Welcome Ghost.

"May I recommend THIS property? It's ideal for first-time haunters..."

"Dang, there goes another piece of the wife's good china. You see father, it's

Polterguest: "When is your brother going to leave? He's driving me crazy!"

"At long last we've discovered evidence of a poultrygeist!"

'I am the ghost of Christmas future...with fries!'

"Your husband says BOO!"

Born of the Dead

Cow Christmas anxiety dreams!

'I hope there's something better on the 'other side'!..'

"I'm sensing an awkward presence."

"Is there anybody there?"

The response of a spirit during a seance is in fact an annoyed neighbour.