Gulf Guru Gifts

Dubai hit by financial difficulties

"How can you be out of wings?"

'I remember when you used to look for answers using your astute powers of deduction.'

On August 14, 2011 at app. 2:00 p, Derek Winslow made scientific history by converting an item of the animal kingdom into an item of the plant kingdom.

Every barbecue has its winners and losers.

'But what is the universe for?'

'Just how big of a tailgate party are you expecting to have?'

would you like it with extra botulism and a touch of salmonella?

'Don't order the Super Duper Jumbo Special.'

Barbecuing Aprons For Today's Guys

"I've just barbecued my head again."

Jack Finds The Giant Grilling At His Giant Grill

It is essential not to overcrowd a tank as this can cause serious problems...

'So glad you could make our vegetarian BBQ.'

Man cooking a single sausage on a very large barbeque.

'I could do that.'

The Rise of Modern Art

'I just love this work from his macaroni period,'

'It's not surprising. The production department is in Spain, the warehouse is in Korea, the accounting division is in Bolivia, the board of directors is in Canada.'

'Wow, talk about genius!'

"Come and get it!"

"I use old Duke to check my steaks. If it feels like Duke's tongue, it's rare, if it feels like his ear, it's medium. . ."

"Lighten up! Your charts aren't that bad."

'...So you claim this is genuine Rembrandt?'

'Has anybody seen the flyswatter?'

"Hickory smoke—that's what gives it that hearty Western flavor."

Creative accounting.

Angler sees sign that says 'Good Spot'. He says, 'This looks like a good spot.'

'How do you like your steaks? Scorched, burnt or cremated?'

Trying to describe the size of the Big Bang.

'No, no....You have it all wrong!'

'I know, we'll lead off the presentation with me telling an incredibly long and seemingly pointless anecdote about the time I burned my finger while lighting the back yard grill...'

Writer and his Muse on a cookout.

'And so thanks to my dad's waistline I now understand the theory of our constantly expanding universe!'

A not-so-happy God, with the Humans, sticking an Eviction Notice to the Earth