Gulf Guru T-Shirts

"How can you be out of wings?"

'I remember when you used to look for answers using your astute powers of deduction.'

On August 14, 2011 at app. 2:00 p, Derek Winslow made scientific history by converting an item of the animal kingdom into an item of the plant kingdom.

Every barbecue has its winners and losers.

'Just how big of a tailgate party are you expecting to have?'

'But what is the universe for?'

would you like it with extra botulism and a touch of salmonella?

'Don't order the Super Duper Jumbo Special.'

"I've just barbecued my head again."

Barbecuing Aprons For Today's Guys

Jack Finds The Giant Grilling At His Giant Grill

'So glad you could make our vegetarian BBQ.'

It is essential not to overcrowd a tank as this can cause serious problems...

Man cooking a single sausage on a very large barbeque.

'I could do that.'

'I just love this work from his macaroni period,'

The Rise of Modern Art

'It's not surprising. The production department is in Spain, the warehouse is in Korea, the accounting division is in Bolivia, the board of directors is in Canada.'

'Wow, talk about genius!'

"Come and get it!"

'Has anybody seen the flyswatter?'

"Hickory smoke—that's what gives it that hearty Western flavor."

"I use old Duke to check my steaks. If it feels like Duke's tongue, it's rare, if it feels like his ear, it's medium. . ."

'...So you claim this is genuine Rembrandt?'

"Lighten up! Your charts aren't that bad."

Creative accounting.

Angler sees sign that says 'Good Spot'. He says, 'This looks like a good spot.'

'How do you like your steaks? Scorched, burnt or cremated?'

Trying to describe the size of the Big Bang.

'Astronomy I, Astronomy II, Astronomy III'

'No, no....You have it all wrong!'

'And so thanks to my dad's waistline I now understand the theory of our constantly expanding universe!'

Writer and his Muse on a cookout.

A not-so-happy God, with the Humans, sticking an Eviction Notice to the Earth

'I know, we'll lead off the presentation with me telling an incredibly long and seemingly pointless anecdote about the time I burned my finger while lighting the back yard grill...'