Guitar-jamming Pastor Gifts

'I understand there have been complaints that his sermons weren't getting through to the teenagers.'

"Whose idea was it to start with the Hallelujah chorus?"

Boy serenading a girl with a large amplifiers and speakers.

"Reverend, I recommend you turn the other cheek."

Vishnu playing twin neck guitar.

'Due to our failure to secure a holiday-relief organisty, the next hymn will also be sung to the tune of Chopsticks.'

Too old to rock'n'roll now, Sir?

Vicar wearing sunglasses.

'To balance last week's twenty-six point sermon, this morning's message will be pointless.'

"He's dumbing down the sermons again."

"Why do parishioners only eat half their donuts???" "Partial indulgence."

"Butcher a tune for you today, ma'am?"

Four Chanting Monks

Guitar Hero.

Two men in T-shirts, one shirt says Jesus loves me, the other Jesus loves me more.

"If she has the voice of an angel I sure hope the others drown her out."

Excommunicate Me.

"And the Lord he sayeth 'doest thou thinkest I knoweth not who sniggereth at the back there?'"

'Man, I'm bombing,'

'...and we used to grumble about not understanding archaic church language!'

"Oooh! What's he gonna do now?!"

Keyboard in Front of a Organ

Heavenly voices.

Choirboy

'The reading is from my brand new mobile phone.'

Pastor wearing sunglasses against the hymns.

"No matter how badly you have sinned, you don't have to worry about losing your coverage!"

'Page 37 in your hymnals and selection #15 on your iPods.'

"...and Lord, we thank You for blessing Farmer Finkel with an abundant bean harvest...and thus our new pews."

Happy Birthday! I wasn't sure what sort of music you like...

"Please rise."

Fuzz - Max almost chokes on his own vomit.

"It's the new church organ."

Church sign.

"How come there's a forbidden fruit but not a forbidden vegetable?"