Groggy Riser Gifts

Diner. Breakfast Specials. I'm a type "C" personality. Until I have my morning coffee I have no personality at all.

Rapunzel in the Morning

"I'm supposed to wake Jasper up at sunrise, but which pile of snow is he asleep under?"

'That morning, nature got to work early...'

"He's never up before eleven."

'I hate the moods yuo wake up in!'

"It's another day, Phil. Planning to suit up?"

'Sorry, you're overqualified for this job.'

'Here he comes in his jimjams - cutting it fine with out breakfast today!'

'Gravity wins - again.'

White Whale Brand Grog

"I love the smell of unemployment in the morning."

'Oh flips! I've forgot me anvil again!'

"Baldo, time to get up! It's the first day of school!"

Army Barracks

'The hardest part of this running routine is exercising the will power to do it.'

"Dang it."

'I don't need that exercise stuff -- I cross the pain threshold just getting out of bed in the morning.'

'You know Doug just isn't a morning person. This afternoon's not looking too good, either.'

"Our breakfast burrito is just like our lunch burrito, except it contains 876 mgs of caffeine."

The breakfast of teens.

'God, I hate Sunday mornings.'

'My body is a temple. A temple full of fat people.'

'Waiter, there's a fly in my soup. Thanks.'

'I set the alarm to 96 years!'

"On days when I need to get out of bed and go to work, I close my eyes until the feeling passes."

'Good Morning!'

"Perhaps you slept SLOWER than usual..."

"I won't be in the office today, my apathy is acting up again."

Army Promotions Board. You need to select one of these contenders for promotion to lieutenant colonet. It's like being in college. I have to pick a major.

The reality of Arabian nights: 'Well, morning comes early, and you've got an awful lot of camels to milk.'

Rooster writes out 'Things to cock-a-doodle-do.'

Psst, sir. Want an extra kick with your morning coffee? Sure, like more caffeine? Like a little wake-up. Huh? The top 10% of American families get nearly 70% of all income, compared to 1980 when they got a third. I'm talkin' 'bout the income gap! Not bad. Does this come with chocolate syrup.

It's ok to be a morning person, Ron, just not all day long.

"He definitely wants to go out."