Grumpy Risers Gifts

'Good Morning!'

Sign on desk reads: 'Thanks for not wishing me a nice day.'

Old Man Journal

Diner. Breakfast Specials. I'm a type "C" personality. Until I have my morning coffee I have no personality at all.

Everyone at happy hour is grumpy.

Thanks for making the breakfast meeting, Harris.

Moanathon.

Grumpy Old Men

"Dang it."

'Kids get right up my nose!'

Whinge drinkers: 'Music is too loud as usual', 'You can never get a seat'.

'My body is a temple. A temple full of fat people.'

"Stu's not a morning person."

I brought your coffee and a list of new things about the world you're going to have to learn to accept

'See, it's right here in the prenup. Just because I rise, it doesn't necessarily mean I have to shine.'

"Stop moaning - you'll ruin our weekend away..."

'Maybe the world isn't getting less friendly, maybe you're getting grumpier.'

"I'm sixty-six – I don't want to see puppets in anything."

'Face it Marvin, you're a madstrom of conflicting emotions.'

"He's a curmudgeon now, but he used to be just a mean old bastard."

"He's angry about getting old."

Old woman staring at pregnant woman's bump.

'I see your Alan's got his Christmas face on again.'

'Dear, your father is just a big crab these days.'

Ex-hippie-now-staunch-Republican Herb Miller's freak flag keeps on flying, much to his chagrin.

'We'll be putting you in the 'crabby neighbor', demographic.'

"Another p**s and vinegar?"

Morgenmuffel

"Another lousy Monday morning...your on Holiday."

'Sign me up for swing shift basic training! I don't think I could handle early morning hours.'

Oh, I'm sure you'd enjoy dinner at the Finnegans' dear - Helen's husband is an old grump.

Shoot - coffee still not invented yet.