Grumpy Adventurers Gifts

"Another lousy Monday morning...your on Holiday."

Sign on desk reads: 'Thanks for not wishing me a nice day.'

"Well, I've come this close to asking out Sylvia Sanchez. But I'm just an average guy! Nothing about me says 'I'm cool! Look at me!'"

'You made a complete fool of yourself at the party last night...I just hope no one knows you were sober.'

"I do wish Henry could run into someone from the dress business to talk to."

'It's your babysitter, where do you keep your fire extinguisher?'

3 Pointless Things To Do At Christmas: Add a little festivity to your favourite fast food/Look up an old friend/Murder the Scotch.

"I hope your cast is not itchy, Stacy. I had an itchy cast on my arm once and it itched ALL the time. It felt like crawling ants! Itchy, itchy, itchy..."

'He doesn't actually drink much. He spills most of it!'

"Oh my God with the singing!"

'I'm sorry, but I haven't understood a word you've babbled since I turned left on red.'

Everyone at happy hour is grumpy.

'Maybe you need to practice walking.'

Gerald's first ever date remains on track.

Grumpy Old Men

"OK, here comes Sylvia Sanchez...it's a perfect time to ask her to the homecoming dance."

Agoraphobic Explorer

"To be perfectly honest, Tarquin, I get fed up listening to your stories about 'the good old days'."

"Is it okay that I said yes to that costume party?"

"Ice rink"

"I've got a bad feeling about this Kenneth.'

"Somewhere along the line the world got a whole lot dorkier."

At the Irritable Bowel Syndrome Convention.

'Kids get right up my nose!'

The plumber asks out the cable lady.

'Good Morning!'

'I tried to slam a revolving door.'

"Well, we’ve covered the weather, my prostate, your incontinence … I suppose our idiot children are up next?"

"Stop moaning - you'll ruin our weekend away..."

Uncle Murray Weekly

'Maybe the world isn't getting less friendly, maybe you're just getting grumpier.'

'Maybe the world isn't getting less friendly, maybe you're getting grumpier.'

Socially awkward shipwrecks.

Newton's Clumsier Brother Discovers Gravity.

Person is hiding behind book entitled 'Coping with shyness'.