Grumpiness Explorer Gifts

'Face it Marvin, you're a madstrom of conflicting emotions.'

Sign on desk reads: 'Thanks for not wishing me a nice day.'

"I hope you don't call that a party face."

"I do wish Henry could run into someone from the dress business to talk to."

'Why am I such a grouch?'

Everyone at happy hour is grumpy.

"You have the Hum bug.'

'Cheer up...'

Thanks for making the breakfast meeting, Harris.

Grumpy Old Men

At the Irritable Bowel Syndrome Convention.

Middle age means a constant struggle not to be irritated by everyone and everything.

'Kids get right up my nose!'

Actual reader mail. Dear Dr. Sadie, Bless you Doctor. I wrote you back last July and asked you if I could expand my grumpiness beyond getting up in the morning. I took your wonderful advice and now there isn't a neighbor, fellow employee or friend that's not fed up with me. You have given me a new existence and once I get out of this lousy jail I'll let the rest of the world know just how annoying I am. I owe it all to you, Sadie. If you ever need a testimonial, call me. Signed, An ol' stick in

"People keep telling me that it takes more facial muscles to frown than it does to smile... I tell them that I am working out."

'He's switched from tweeting on Twitter to growling on a new social media site called Growler. Suits him better.'

"You're still grumpy. See if you can get a refund on that Happy Meal."

Uncle Murray Weekly

"Well, we’ve covered the weather, my prostate, your incontinence … I suppose our idiot children are up next?"

I HATE STUFF

"Stop moaning - you'll ruin our weekend away..."

"Is everything okay, dear? You're smiling!"

'Maybe the world isn't getting less friendly, maybe you're just getting grumpier.'

'Maybe the world isn't getting less friendly, maybe you're getting grumpier.'

"But a deep sense of grievance and indignation IS my Happy Place."

Wife about mad man leaving church: 'You'll have to excuse my husband. He always wakes up grumpy.'

'No.'

'Don't you snap at me, mister!'

'Dinner.'

'Be advised, Monday through Thursday I don't do 'perky'.'

It was only a matter of time until Gertrude turned into a grumpy cat.

Moan Pig.

"He's a curmudgeon now, but he used to be just a mean old bastard."

Grumpy Moody Boy.

Old woman staring at pregnant woman's bump.