Grocery Store Antics Aficionado Gifts

"I'm bored. Want to block a grocery store aisle with our cart?"

'I love this supermarket; they have the easiest to understand wine department.'

''I'm totally committed to simplifying my life. No more shitake jalapeno pesto.'

'Do we have any alligator pears?'

"Goodness! These tomatoes look so good!"

Witches Checkout.

"The checkout clerk will now testily remind you to press 'ok'."

'Can we get the corn that's already been chewed?!'

'Look, Mum, those loaves have had some babies!'

Mouse shopping after hours

'Bananas! Once you've skinned them and removed the bone, there's nothing left.'

"Mummy! Can't we go to Tescos like everyone else?"

"I know I've matured because I choose to purchase my own candy instead of stealing my children's."

"Why doesn't the budget ax ever fall in the produce department?"

"I need one of them and one of them..."

Low income vampires.

Free Range / Deranged

"This banana I bought yesterday, when I peeled it it was empty!"

Little Miss Muffet in Store.

"I'm still trying to get used to ordering food online."

On that fateful visit to the supermarket, it was Tongue's misstep that would lead to a fall, a lawsuit, and an eventual catch-phrase.

Woman has man in shopping trolley

New: imitation spaghetti - Impasta.

The Creature of the Black Legume

"Don't, son – once they cross over into meats, they're out of our jurisdiction."

"Unexpected Spanish Inquisition in bagging area ..."

Meats

"Hmmmm...What am I in the mood for?"

"When water turns into ice, which of its physical properties increases?"

'Now let's see...We need fodder...'

"Bag for life?"