Grocery Shopping Enthusiast Gifts

"I know I've matured because I choose to purchase my own candy instead of stealing my children's."

Do me a favor - don

Trolley Cage.

Is this the meat you wouldn't feed to our dog?!

Garlic bread.

'I remember when we only got sticker shock at car dealers.'

Woman has man in shopping trolley

"I need one of them and one of them..."

Domestic Superheroes!!

"Good For You / Bad For You"

'No Renee, not until you get two degrees, pass a rigorous physical, and beat out thousands of other qualified individuals.'

"Enough with how great the public schools are. Just tell us – is there a Trader Joe’s nearby?"

What do you mean you prefer the sound of the sign of the right?! What part of 'either way we're dead' do you not understand?

Twenty-first century baby walker

Heavy man sees 'Comfort Food' aisle

"Wild-caught, farm-raised, lab-grown, beach-found, or aquarium-harvested."

'If by 'great', you mean 'terrible', then yes, we have plenty of great beers for under $4.00 a six-pack.'

"I want some long, thin square ones - for chips..."

Important Food Groups

"Milk, butter, bread - all past the expiration date. either he just hadn't noticed before, or his time machine worked."

"After the drugstore, I need you to find fresh parmesan."

Dad Trophies

Instant Laundry Detergent, 'Just add water'.

"I used to be a vegetarian. Then I became a vegan. Then a fruitarian. Now I only eat manna that falls from Heaven."

Only One Item or Fewer.

Supermarket - World Cup Specials

"Wait, what are you doing?"

"Everything's gone up."

Only 1 calorie per serving: One million servings per can.

'I love this supermarket; they have the easiest to understand wine department.'

Witches Checkout.

Unusual Offers

"I know I should have gotten a cart, but I can't give up now."

'I decided to start buying food in bulk. I hope you're hungry!'

'Diet considerations.'