Grandma Gifts

A woman standing beside a stove full of steaming pots and pans.

Old ladies stack their walkers to rescue cat in tree.

"Yes, you are speaking to Grandma."

'How come grandma can have blue hair, but I can't?'

Final Round of Biggest Snoozer.

"You can still go over the river and through the woods, but it's cheaper to fly."

'But Grandma, how did you text on them?'

"Handwrite and mail grandma's thank you note instead of texting? I don't have this kind of time!"

"Grandma, somebody wants to talk to you, but I can't get your phone off this cord."

'Don't you mean you want to learn to 'Tweet,' not, 'Twerk,' Grandma?'

"My grandma needs reading glasses to read. I guess they only taught writing and 'rithmetic back in her day."

"Maybe you should call Grandma for technical support."

Make do and mend

"When you said I'd 'Really clean up' when Grandma visits I didn't know you meant my room!"

"Looks like Harriet mixed her lights and darks again."

"Be sure and eat your frozen vegetables."

"I want to buy you a card that reflects the sacrifices you've made on my behalf, Mom. Where's your purse?"

"I had 'the talk' with my grandma where I showed her how to use her iPad, iPhone, and iPod."

"It's pretty Gran, but can it take pictures and send text?"

'Yes, I'm sure they'll let you watch your soap operas, grandma.'

"When I grow up, I'm going to have a mustache just like you, Grandma."

Addicted gambler.

Lady taking dog for walk.

'You think you had a rough day? Today I saw grandma wearing a pair of yoga pants!'

"Yo - I'm way overdone in here!"

Lady using paint roller as rolling pin for baking dough.

You know you're getting up there in years when your birthday cake requires that extra box of candles....

"Ask Mom for Sweet Chunk Cookies. If she says no, ask Grandma."

The geometry of everyday life

Battleaxe offers free advice.

"This one is perfect for Thanksgiving. It comes prestained in cranberry sauce, gravy and pumpkin pie."

Happy Eightieth Birthday

'Grandpa, would you ever wear an adult diaper?'

"Come on, men! This is for our kids to live in a free world! And for our grandkids to grow up in a world where they can spend hours a day looking at cats on some sort of fantastic information machine!"

Mom! The maid is hiding dust under Grandma again!