Gourmet Humor Lover Gifts

'What an uncanny coincidence! The starter, main course, dessert and wine you've ordered are all the cheapest on the menu!'

"You're the lid to my pot."

'The heart and eyes feel nothing, but the stomach and ears are completely infatuated.'

'Be honest. Does this double bacon cheeseburger with large fries and shake make me look fat?'

"Do you want to be vaguely dissatisfied with Italian or Korean?"

'You're lucky there, Sir. That's the last one in the world.'

Better Not Squash.

'I'll give you a bite of my calamari for one of your stuffed shrimp.'

"I'll bet you're very proud of your handsome, well-behaved little sporks here."

'Lets all thank Martha for her very innovative 'Hot Dog Crepes'.'

Cooking with Pierre

"There must be a place we can wait on line for an hour before eating."

'The Specials are the same as the Main Menu dishes, but with more florid descriptions.'

"Then again, an honest profile picture would not have got me a wonderful 'Duck Confit with a Chocolat Creme Brulee.'"

'There was sizzle but no steak.'

Supermarket Warehouse. At night, with just security here, the products sing classic karaoke. The orange juice is belting Elvis'"All Shook Up." Peanut butter and jelly performed a duet of "Love Will Keep Us Together." children's breakfast cereal sang "Sugar, Sugar." And sriracha sauce did a rendition of "Great Balls of Fire"! What song will the ground beef choose? Jimmy Buffett's "Cheeseburger in Paradise," of course!

What makes the flies in your soup "artisanal"? I know, right? Personally, I think it's just a lot of hype perpetrated by the flies. Menu.

"I like my steak well done."

Pizza with 'Made in China' imprinted on it.

'Jingling your change won't get us a better table.'

"Here's the pub-grub you ordered"

"It all comes down to the aging and fermentation process."

'The chef's hat was delicious! But the hair...'

Haute Cuisine Meets Low Couture

Le Gourmet Bistro. Paging Mister Zah, paging Mister Zah. Do we have a Pete Zah here?

'No, I don't have a favorite. Dung is dung.'

Kitchen - Sign reads 'Out of Hors D'Oeuvres.'

The mushroom pickers

"I'm sorry about the delay, sir, but Chef's anger management class ran over."

'You order the jumbo combo?'

"What will change my life?"

"Say hello to my little friend!"

"I always see the class as half-baked."

"Right now I'm enjoying that brief period between having just lost weight and putting it back on."

"If you tasted like a Umami, where would you be hiding?"