Gothic Fashionista Pillows

"What do you think? Too Edward Gorey?"

'It's MURDER putting on make-up with no reflection!'

'Give him a minute - he just found out his daughter has the Goth gene.'

The lady is a Vamp.

"True goths don't take the summer off, Brandon."

Dragon Hair-dryer.

'Good news - basic black is being shown this season.'

'Don't worry, you're safe. I started my diet today.'

Trilby - 'Je prong!'

"So besides opera and lurking, what do you do to relax?"

Tim Burton

Vampire baby in 'Grav-co' stroller.

Cybergoth.

Four Horsemen.

'At last, dusk...and my e-mails!'

Drunk Vampire

"Norman still has seventies flashbacks sometimes."

'I succumbed to pierce pressure.'

"Yeah, I want a neck tat with gothic lettering that says, 'Welcome to a career in the fast food service industry.'"

Pie Shoppe and Sweeny Todd's barber shop.

Janet Leigh caricature

The Death of Pierrot

"I figured I've got the money so why not spend it."

"It was our grandmother's wedding dress—we had her exhumed so you could wear it."

"Architectural Digest calls it 'Twilight chic.'"

"How come Dracula's hair looked so neat if he can't look in a mirror"

'My doctor's put me on a strict diet. From now on I have to ask my victims how high their cholesterol is.'

The Ins and Outs of childhood

"Happy New Year!"

Vampire practical jokes.

"It needs some work, but it does have good bones."

Vampire sprinkles blood bath in bath water

'Check it out, honey...some of my wedding clothes still fit!'

'Ooh! But neck piercings are soooo last season.'

Count Dracula's biggest pet peeve: waking up with "coffin head".