Goat Farming Gifts

Where do you draw the line? Goat milk. Goat cheese. Goat ice cream.

'Don't worry, the first 30 years of working with goats are the hardest.'

"The good old days of eating the washing off the line are all gone methinks: The farmer has bought an electric dryer..."

Goat about goat: 'He's no longer gruff since he's been on Prozac.'

"Your shepherd, Louie, has retired. I'm Mr. Smathers. I will be your grazing-resource coördinator and flock welfare-and-security manager."

Vincent Van Goat.

The worm that churned!

Horny Nanny Seeks Lonely Goat Herd.

'I'm collecting goat poop for my strawberries.' 'I always put cream and sugar on mine.'

"I like to stay on top of things."

The Lawman

'It's better than we expected. Now the sheep produce wool in the winter and cotton in the summer.'

'Nonsense! They can't All have headaches.'

First there were virtual-pets. Now there are virtual owners and ranchers.

"Don't worry Mum, if there's a storm and lightning, I'll stay safely next to Bob: My teacher said that lightning always hits the highest point..."

"We’re trying to inject a little pastoralism into our lives."

'The persistence of Goats': Oil on Canvas, 1964. An important work from the 'Dr Sues meets Salvador Dali' school of art.

'Excellent napkin.'

'Don't worry about the condition of the pitch, I've got my best goat working on it.'

"The downside of living in the wild is that I need to shear myself now. Boy, do I now appreciate the skill professional shearers have: it's hard!"

Cowboy Slippers

"Actually, I would rather have a dog. It's just that we need the eggs."

"I didn't even know they could knit!"

'She says her stomachs ache.'

The first stock exchange - 'It's agreed then, one of my Longhorns for one of your holsteins.'

The young Shepherd was determined to show the flock who was the boss!

'Bloomin rare breeds.'

'Yesterday he was a kingpin, but today he's just a lynchpin.'

"OK, today, Bob, your team is on blackberry clearing at the Brown's farm, while Lisa, your team is on thistle clearing at the Barker's farm..."

Climbing with a mountain goat.

Shear Love.

'He's a goatee herder.'

'Here comes the pimp.'

'Oh, I won't fight you, you're welcome to have them: I can't stand the nagging anymore!'

Mountain Goat Olympics. 1 2 3.