Animal Farming Gifts

A Rustic Moralist.

'You think YOU have peer pressure!?'

"One more word out of you, young man, and it'll be no stale lettuce for your dessert tonight."

'Bloomin rare breeds.'

Holy Cow

"The good old days of eating the washing off the line are all gone methinks: The farmer has bought an electric dryer..."

'Keep me informed of the herds' mood.'

'Houston, I'm prepared to land...'

"A wet winter, but we're making the best of it."

Apples for sale

12 O'clock was 'I'm a tractor time.'

baby sweetcorn...

"If you ask me, wearing these things only makes them nervous."

'Little Yank' Calf Puller.

"No, I like the plan. Just saying, have you ever done any actual tunnelling?"

Chase me, chase me cows.

Humans...What is their purpose?

'The circle is complete!'

Cow's Last Will and Testament.

'Hi, Doc! I don't think I'm going to need you after all....'

A sheep dog has stacked the sheep four high - 'He used to be with the circus before he came to the farm...!'

'Have you tried pulling the udders?'

Lactose Intolerant

'So where do you think pineapple juice comes from?'

'Life is great' down on the farm.

Don't be fooled by the theatrics. She'll only suck your sap!

Pumpkin patch

'It's not easy being green on grass!'

If a bunch of crazy red headed clowns come out that door...Run like you've never ran before!

One Man's Meat is Another Man's Poetry

"Black or white, Vicar?"

A cat has caught a cow which it is dragging through it's cat flap.

"The Lord works in mysterious ways, I mean, alpacas? What are they? It’s like Bob Seger mated with a llama."

'Cow in love'

'Steak Ted?'