Animal Husbandry Gifts

"As long as it's woolly I don't ask questions."

Goat Milk.

"Kind words help the dairy cow produce good milk. They go in one ear and out the udder."

"No, sorry. I couldn't possibly take on another one. I'm short-staffed as it is."

Highland cow and Scottish bull fighter.

Alpaca winning Premium Wool Championship.

A panel of chicken judges grade another chicken's newly laid egg.

"I've never trusted cows."

'Frankly, he could have finished me off before going on strike: It's unprofessional!'

'Down a few volts yet Harry!'

'This'll save a couple of journeys!'

Cow's Last Will and Testament.

'How do those pants fit with five teats?' 'Like a glove.'

"I don't want to worry you, but this years prize winning pig, usually ends up as next years prize winning sausages."

'I love herd mentality, don't you?'

'Granted, we don't have quality, but we do have quantity!'

'I used to love the wild abandon of the old stampedes.'

'Now that we've got a new bull, is he the calf's stepfather?'

'There is so much penicillin in this milk we could use to to treat shipping fever!"

'I guess everything's okay, doc, two legs is showing, one out of each hole."

'Can't understand all this fuss over cattle growth hormones.'

'Ain't no lonelier life than being a free-range chicken boy.'

What we have here is a high benefit, high risk scenario!

'Abandon Sheep.'

'What can I say? I'm a grass magnet!'

The patent's pending

'Your barn door's open.'

'Hi, Doc! I don't think I'm going to need you after all....'

"Will you be posting this on ewe tube?"

"Dear, I'd like you to meet the Holsteins."

"They're organic, vegetarian, and they challenge traditional gender roles."

'It's an absurd world! I'm a vegetarian and my main purpose in life is to be eaten by a non-vegetarian!'

Boy, this stuff's hard to swallow!

You missed a bit!

Cow to other: 'One of us has to wear a bell if we want to be herd.'