Sheep Husbandry Gifts

Support group for sheep.

'Well, Martha, there goes the end of our virgin wool.'

'Little Yank' Calf Puller.

Cow's Last Will and Testament.

'Hi, Doc! I don't think I'm going to need you after all....'

A sheep dog has stacked the sheep four high - 'He used to be with the circus before he came to the farm...!'

"The Lord works in mysterious ways, I mean, alpacas? What are they? It’s like Bob Seger mated with a llama."

'It's not easy being green on grass!'

EWE 2.

Please Drove Carefully.

"If you could just get rid of the split ends, that will be fine."

"Well, I'll miss him, but all his friends are backpacking Europe to herd sheep this summer, too."

Sheep Ledger

Why would birdie need newspaper?

"It's my home grown quail call. Quail don't come when I blow it, but cows sure do."

"Stick with me baby, and you'll eat slop every day."

"Here we go again. Look at me everybody....I'm a cloud."

"They’re real."

Miniature Cattle Fanciers

'He's the best sheepdog I ever had.'

"Static cling."

Sheep In Curlers

Pull the udder one

"Your shepherd, Louie, has retired. I'm Mr. Smathers. I will be your grazing-resource coördinator and flock welfare-and-security manager."

'Sorry lady, can't help you: Yes, I can herd pretty much anything, but not cats, and certainly not kittens...'

'You're suffering from job-stress insomnia. Stop counting sheep to fall asleep.'

'First give me the food - then you get the egg.'

'He's the best bull I've ever had.'

You must un-learn bowel control!

Going Down?

"Kind words help the dairy cow produce good milk. They go in one ear and out the udder."

'This'll save a couple of journeys!'

"It's harder to 'lead from the middle' than I thought."

"You can always count on me."

Farmer Christmas.