Sheep Farming Gifts

"Your shepherd, Louie, has retired. I'm Mr. Smathers. I will be your grazing-resource coördinator and flock welfare-and-security manager."

Shear Love.

Sheepwrecked

Thinking about work.

'It's better than we expected. Now the sheep produce wool in the winter and cotton in the summer.'

Dung

"I didn't even know they could knit!"

"Your resume says you specialize in field work."

"The downside of living in the wild is that I need to shear myself now. Boy, do I now appreciate the skill professional shearers have: it's hard!"

"Whenever I can't sleep I count people."

Early Ram Raids

The young Shepherd was determined to show the flock who was the boss!

'Wow, you got Bob! Lucky you, he's definitely the best shearer around!'

'Now, don't cry Darling, it will grow back...'

'How'd the negotiations go? Take a wild guess.'

'The wool is virgin - it's none of your damn business about the sheep!'

Black Sheep

'The effects of winter weather on the lambing season has disastrous side effects.'

'You know, our barber really sucks.'

'It's a quarter-to-three and there's no one in the place except ewe and me.'

The Lawman

'You guys shear this, I'll go and get another one!'

'I've told him a little blue spot would do fine, but he does like to express himself.'

One of their favourite games was to pull the wool over their eyes.

Sheephunters

A sheep dog has stacked the sheep four high - 'He used to be with the circus before he came to the farm...!'

EWE 2.

Support group for sheep.

Please Drove Carefully.

"If you could just get rid of the split ends, that will be fine."

"Well, I'll miss him, but all his friends are backpacking Europe to herd sheep this summer, too."

Sheep Ledger

"Here we go again. Look at me everybody....I'm a cloud."

'He's the best sheepdog I ever had.'

"Static cling."