Animal Husbandry Enthusiast Gifts

Matador Artificial Insemination.

'Little Yank' Calf Puller.

Cow's Last Will and Testament.

'Hi, Doc! I don't think I'm going to need you after all....'

'It's not easy being green on grass!'

"The Lord works in mysterious ways, I mean, alpacas? What are they? It’s like Bob Seger mated with a llama."

"Well, I'll miss him, but all his friends are backpacking Europe to herd sheep this summer, too."

'Stop cracking and hulling his seeds. He's accustomed to working for his food.'

Why would birdie need newspaper?

"It's my home grown quail call. Quail don't come when I blow it, but cows sure do."

"Stick with me baby, and you'll eat slop every day."

"They’re real."

Slinky Cow World

Miniature Cattle Fanciers

Pull the udder one

'When I was studying animal husbandry, I met the animal who became my husband.'

'What's founder?'

'He's the best bull I've ever had.'

'First give me the food - then you get the egg.'

Sick Rancher Humor

You must un-learn bowel control!

"Kind words help the dairy cow produce good milk. They go in one ear and out the udder."

'This'll save a couple of journeys!'

Farmer Christmas.

'Yessir, I just finished my first spay...but how did you know?'

Objects in mirror bear no relation to reality.

"Just a trim and tidy-up, please."

"I was hoping Calvin would grow up to be top sirloin..."

"Yeah, our garden is always a mess: We can't stop ourselves foraging for worms..."

World of Cow.

'This is cow country, pal, and we're not real big on innovation.'

'The first day on the job was not going well for Al...'

"And when someone gets your goat, what do you suppose it is that keeps you from going and getting it back?"

'Wool ewe pullover yourself together.'

Boy, this stuff's hard to swallow!