Animal Farms Gifts

"Morgan's animal farm? Oh, yes...You just fly three miles south and then turn left and follow the highway for two miles! You can land in the parking lot!"

'Little Yank' Calf Puller.

Cow's Last Will and Testament.

'Hi, Doc! I don't think I'm going to need you after all....'

"The Lord works in mysterious ways, I mean, alpacas? What are they? It’s like Bob Seger mated with a llama."

'It's not easy being green on grass!'

Bubble Gum Farms.

"I think the ants are mooning me again."

'Henrietta is so self-confident.'

A man in a car waits for a large herd of cows to cross the road; once they have crossed he finds a cow sitting in the passenger seat of his car.

'Rollin', rollin', rollin',...keep them dogies rollin'...'

'It's the same everywhere: body over brains.'

''Animal Farm' by George Orwell is definitely my favourite book...'

Why would birdie need newspaper?

"It's my home grown quail call. Quail don't come when I blow it, but cows sure do."

'Rabbits make great pets, but it's best to have them one at a time.'

"Stick with me baby, and you'll eat slop every day."

"They’re real."

Miniature Cattle Fanciers

Pull the udder one

"Your shepherd, Louie, has retired. I'm Mr. Smathers. I will be your grazing-resource coördinator and flock welfare-and-security manager."

'He's the best bull I've ever had.'

You must un-learn bowel control!

The worm that churned!

'First give me the food - then you get the egg.'

"Kind words help the dairy cow produce good milk. They go in one ear and out the udder."

Animals flying kites patterned like their skins.

'This'll save a couple of journeys!'

Farmer Christmas.

Objects in mirror bear no relation to reality.

'You're FLIES YOU FOOLS!'

The Lawman

"How can you cross the road so decisively? I have to stop halfway across every time to rethink it."

'This is cow country, pal, and we're not real big on innovation.'

'Wool ewe pullover yourself together.'