Gifting Humor Pillows

An imprisoned reflection

"Legs together, David -- You're hamspreading again."

'Ya gotta love the way this farmer gets into Halloween spirit.'

"Captain, we've taken on strippers."

"You can't blow out the candles. You're rolled."

Bagel problems.

"Ma'am, do you realize how fast you were... going?"

Christmas Present Wrapping Service.

Solitaire card shark.

A sheep, a humming bird and a beetle - 'Baa, hum, bug'

'Happy birthday, dear... It's an executive rock.'

'He's not leaving, but if we collect enough, he might.'

'Mom and Dad, like when did you first text that you loved each other?'

'I don't know about you but I spend a fortune on shoes.'

"That does it, I'm getting a snow blower!"

Dogs with alcohol collars.

Acme Coffee Co.

Nail Bar

Scientist using his microscope to thread a needle to repair his torn shirt.

The Next Product For Boomers: Designer Adult Diapers.

'You've been smarting off a lot lately -- Have you been fooling around with that 'Tree of Knowledge'?'

'Oh great...another new tie.'

Extra wheelie bin for cats.

Helicopter as a clothes drier

A.I. Newreader Malfunctions. . . or does it?

I think the best part was when we decided not to record it.

'I just feel so much better buying the free range Pinatas.'

Useless gifts for elephants.

Hunting Wolves For Fun/500 Ways to cook Mutton.

That's very thoughtful of you - a check for five gallons of gas.

"Yes, I still wear my Harvard ring. It helps when I slug someone."

The art of regifting

Everywhere that Mary went the lamb was sure to go...

'Didn't you buy me exactly the same book for my birthday last year?' 'Yes I did... I hope you'll read it this year...'

"I have this 'I love Susie' tattoo on my chest and I married Doreen yesterday!"