Gift Critique Pillows

"...Now will you believe me! It's too...big!"

"Cheers! Well, this is exciting. I've never had a dinner date with a duck before." "Relax, honey. I'm just here for the bread."

'What's that? It's a leaving present for the next person who comes in late.'

"A GPS! Thanks guys! It's exactly what I need to guide my sleigh...you know, in light of that unfortunate hunting accident."

I'm prepared to admit that you may have startled me a bit, sure!

"Petting zoo" "Heavy petting zoo"

'Take my tip,sonny and say it with jelly babies.'

"Candy wuld be nice onice in a while."

"How could we be short? You had enough chocolate for everyone on our list!"

Christmas Presents.

Santa called but you were out!

"Of course, I'm willing to negotiate. . ."

You Will Have a Merry Christmas. . . Resistance is Futile.

'Why thankyou! ... and I've got one for you!'

'You still owe me the pony from last year!'

"'Season's Greetings' looks O.K. to me. Let's run it by the legal department."

'They were all out of roses.'

'They say my tests are too hard. Maybe I should switch from Essay to Connect-the-Dot.'

Valentines Day truck

"That's $20 for you if you pluck the tail feathers off my rival over there..."

"...And our 'Holiday Scented' candle smells just like credit cards."

How the gift registry should really work

"He's upset I'm getting 36,000 points for speeding in one night."

Frankenstein's Monster receiving birthday present.

Factory Recall Unicorn.

Your basket: Gold. . .You may also like: Frankincense and Myrrh.

"Coming up... more of the same mindless pop songs with repetitive lyrics and nauseating melodies!"

"Tell your assistant it's perfect."

Christmas Present Wrapping Service.

"I always ask for a pony for my birthday. I find it gives the most bargaining room."

Cindy had asked Santa for a puppy this Christmas...maybe, just maybe he'd been listening...?