Product Critique Pillows

Factory Recall Unicorn.

Polluted geese

Roads with a view.

Oh, the armor is state of the art

Actually, Mama was her third word. Buy Now were her first two.

'They say my tests are too hard. Maybe I should switch from Essay to Connect-the-Dot.'

"Wanna play 'Waitin’ on the Cable Guy'?"

"Your mom's not protesting sex and violence on TV...she's taking a stand against those early Christmas ads..."

Bad Office Planning

The economy doctor

'The shareholders are in an uproar; they demand change. Bob, switch seats with Gerald.'

'The following program was made possible by a totally unscrupulous sponsor....'

You want tech support. This is mockery and belittlement.

"Listen! Hear that? Nothing is beeping!"

Too much packaging

Muscle Steroids.

Suggestions Box

If they didn't show commercials, people would not know what to buy.

Emojis for psychos.

Welcome to Stupidity Night, Pay Full Price and Get In Free.

Supermarket Special Offer! Two for the price of three!

'Our new app sells for $100 and detects intelligence. If a customer buys one, they don't have any.'

"And if you sign up for our Gold Star membership level we stop pestering you to sign up."

"...Now will you believe me! It's too...big!"

Book about the real meaning of Christmas is on sale.

"Thank YOU Amazon!"

"It's something from the gas company. Don't they know it takes more than bold red font, to move me to respond. I need to be wooed, fawned over. After all, I'm more than a checkbook."

Girls (and Boys) on Film

"It appears the ark was designed with no bathroom."

Bad Reads

"These kitchen shears are great for cutting plastic packaging. . . like the packaging they come in."

Man can't open the plastic packaging of his plastic cutter.

Lesser-Known Features of the Apollo 13 Command Module

'I'd like a newspaper with no car, house or mobile phone adverts in it.'

Face Cream with Highly Moronic Acid