Getting New Glasses Pillows

"P.A.Y.F.O.R.Y.O.U.R.G.L.A.S.S.E.S."

An Optometrist's sign in the form of an Eye-test chart.

"Think of these as the car your face is driving."

Glasses

"Would you rather be smart or funny?"

My mom must need new glasses, too. She's always squinting at dad and saying, 'are you wearing THAT shirt?'

'You'll need a while to get used to them.'

'Crikey, you've got to have good eye-sight to look through those glasses, haven't you?'

'The spots are much clearer.'

"It took all day, but we finally got there."

"Here are our latest frames, designed to make you look with-it, even though your past-it."

"Your prescription 3D glasses are here!"

'No. The television screen hasn't gone red - You've got tomato ketchup all over your glasses!'

"Keep your glasses on. It will look like twice as much."

Summertime

'Rollin', rollin', rollin',...keep them dogies rollin'...'

"Where do you remember last seeing your glasses?"

'This is way better than a litter box.'

"I've had these glasses since I was a kid, when my doctor told me I'd grow into them..."

"You really need to think about getting glasses."

'Apparently it's part of the evolutionary process!'

"Overkill, dude."

The sunglasses.

'When are you going to admit you need glasses?'

'The other kids at school say I might need glasses, Dad.'

'No cheating'

'You forgot your glasses again, didn't you?'

'No thanks. I'm just squinting...'

'Oh silly me, I'm trying to fix my glasses with nasel spray instead of super-glue!'

The public was right

"May I borrow your glasses so I can find my glasses?"

'I have way too much respect and dignity to dye the grey out of my hair... so instead could you all just put on these brown-tinted glasses.'

'Why do you always have to make a spectacle of yourself.'

'Having trouble getting used to your new bi-focals'

'Don't worry...you'll grow into them.'