Gastronomic Guru Gifts

"Ciel! Supergastronome!"

'Ah, Garbanzo, truly you are a noble bean.'

"Yo, Cézanne, paint faster. I need those grapes for the Madeira sauce."

(Experimental dessert) (Pi à la mode)

"Carpe pizza"

"First you make a roux."

A tureen of chefs

Gas Powered

"You didn't say 'excellent choice' when I ordered! What did I do wrong?"

"Remember...the way to a person's heart is through their stomach!"

Quartet of Chefs

Paul Bocuse caricature

"I didn't find the gooseberry fool at all amusing."

"Your food didn't melt, young man... this is the soup course."

Counting ribs

'Sparky, fetch me an impudent little chardonnay.'

"And the cheese in your omelette? Cheddar, Brie, aged Gouda, Morbier, Torta del Casar, Double Gloucester, Époisses, Shropshire blue, or American?"

"You'll love this. It's swarthy yet munificent, didactic and gregarious with hints of dogma."

"And which regional cuisine would you be interested in this evening—Northwester, Southwestern, Southeastern, or Northeastern?"

"The chef is going to need more than just your ‘compliments’ tonight … he’s in one of his moods."

"Will you have a Sphinx?"

'Of course you're very dear to me - that meal just cost a fortune.'

"Waiter! Two of your finest menus!"

'Why, of course I remember our first date -- I had filet mignon, potatoes au gratin, sauteed....'

"Tonight, perhaps Mrs. Lewis would prefer this quiet little table for two from which to send back her entrée?"

"I just finished your manuscript and I found the ending delicious."

"Compliments to the chef! Pass it on."

'Waiter...my entrée fell over.'

"At first glance this diet might seem boring but then you realize there are actually seven varieties of kale!"

"Yes, we have blue cheese. Do you want it in electric, sky or navy blue?"

"Everything taste so divinely artisanal."

"Can you romance me after my tiramisu?"

"Pizza sounds wonderful. Italian, Greek or Hipster?"

"Hmmm ... you're right — I forgot the brie."

French wine