Dining Guru Gifts

'That's enough, thank you.'

"Your food didn't melt, young man... this is the soup course."

Come dine with me!

Counting ribs

'Sparky, fetch me an impudent little chardonnay.'

"And the cheese in your omelette? Cheddar, Brie, aged Gouda, Morbier, Torta del Casar, Double Gloucester, Époisses, Shropshire blue, or American?"

"You'll love this. It's swarthy yet munificent, didactic and gregarious with hints of dogma."

"The chef is going to need more than just your ‘compliments’ tonight … he’s in one of his moods."

"And which regional cuisine would you be interested in this evening—Northwester, Southwestern, Southeastern, or Northeastern?"

"Yo, Cézanne, paint faster. I need those grapes for the Madeira sauce."

"Will you have a Sphinx?"

"Waiter! Two of your finest menus!"

'We must be 50,000 calories away from home by now.'

'Why, of course I remember our first date -- I had filet mignon, potatoes au gratin, sauteed....'

'Of course you're very dear to me - that meal just cost a fortune.'

"Tonight, perhaps Mrs. Lewis would prefer this quiet little table for two from which to send back her entrée?"

"I just finished your manuscript and I found the ending delicious."

'Waiter...my entrée fell over.'

"Compliments to the chef! Pass it on."

"Yes, we have blue cheese. Do you want it in electric, sky or navy blue?"

French wine

"Hmmm ... you're right — I forgot the brie."

'No, I'm not the sommelier; in fact, I don't even work here - I've just always wanted to try this wine.'

"Everything taste so divinely artisanal."

'You realize we're only having three people over...'

"Can you romance me after my tiramisu?"

"Pizza sounds wonderful. Italian, Greek or Hipster?"

"Is the asparagus farm-raised or wild-caught?"

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'It's the essence of springtime. You're really enjoying it.'

"I'll have the barbecued half-pounder, with all the ramifications."

"Deep-dish pizza calls for deep-glass beer."

"It was wonderful, Henri. Arnold had died and gone to heaven."

Cheese

"Spoiler alert! If you read the specials, you'll find out the Chef's Surprise!"