Fur Admirer Gifts

"I lick my fur and then rub against their legs. They think I'm being affectionate, but I'm actually just wiping cat spit on them."

"Foster failure"

"And, when the DNA test results arrived, the woman realized her so-called 'little terrier mix' had been part German shepherd all along."

"I dunno, looks like a trap."

'Or we could just ask her what kind of dog it is.'

"A little help, please."

Canine obidience class: 'He wouldn't budge from the armchair.'

Dogs shaving

Atomic Bear: Part 21

"Go ahead if you want to: Me, I'll wait for the bears to be sated before I risk it..."

"Well, if she didn't insist on giving me this stupid look, she wouldn't need to buy me coats in winter..."

Mrs Sutherland and her American Hairless Terrier.

'Honestly, now that Tiger is neutered I'm perfectly happy just cuddling.'

'Well you said you wanted sushi for lunch.'

'Not only didn't he turn into a prince, but he gave me these awful warts!'

'I wouldn't bother. They're probably gluten-free vegetarians.'

"I think it's unfair to call her a "crazy cat-lady": She just loves all 63 of us..."

"Is it me, or would a dung beetle taste really good right now?"

'He's not a skilled pitcher. In fact, he throws like a nerd...'

Living with a cataholic.

'Who did you have lick your hair?'

Leadership never hibernates.

I hate these he shed, she shed cases.

'Master is too lazy to walk us, so we walk each other...'

"Do you carry any shampoos that have been tested on little kittens?"

"Oh, its just a fun fur that my husband got me."

A relevant sign for the shopkeeper's predicament.

Tragically Roger was to discover that his 'managing aggression' seminar did not work in a wilderness setting.

"One medium rare and one with honey."

'My wife doesn't understand us.'

'I keep having this recurring nightmare, that when I get back from walking in the woods my porridge is too cold.'

"I'm going to introduce you to the wonderful world of trees."

Undisputed Heavyweight Champion of the Wood

"I can't hear you. Are you playing with the dog again?"

'Did you just hear that? Scientist say we are now an endangered species and mating should be our top priority!'