Funny Food Appreciators Pillows

Soup: Cream of Yesterday's Special.

'Be honest. Does this double bacon cheeseburger with large fries and shake make me look fat?'

"I forgot to take a pic of the tacos."

Menu Dating

'You're supposed to just lick the cone!'

'Dinner will be ready soon -- the submarine sandwiches are soaking now.'

Better Not Squash.

Cooking with Pierre

"Beans, Them Beans, Them Beans, Beans, Beans..."

"Hi, Honey. For dinner we're having Shis Kabob."

"Here's the pub-grub you ordered"

"Of course our GM vegetables are safe, Madam, they told us so themselves!"

'Trust me, Madam, that fish is fresh!'

"In addition to the menu, we have a few specials on the board."

What can I get you? Coffee? Tea? Sandwich? The mackerel mocha sounds lovely. What's in it? The usual. Chocolate. Soy milk. Mackerel. Yes, but is the mackerel farm-raised or from the sea? Ocean. Atlantic? Pacific? Indian? Arctic? Antarctic? I'm not sure. Oh. Ok ... well what's the mackerel's mercury content? Negligible, I'm sure. Ok. Was it exposed to any chlorine? Or copper sulphate? Or malathion? Was it treated with kindness? Was it read stories and sung to before bedtime? Yes. Never mind, it s

"Tell me, is a single spaghetti a spaghetus or what?"

'Waiter...!' (there is a human in my soup)

'Of course I'd never have so much as looked at Timothy if it wasn't for his nose for truffles.'

'These are my dieting glasses. They magnify the food so I think I'm eating more than I really am.'

The Chef's dumplings were his speciality.

Waiter, why are there TWO flies in my soup? The second fly is the first fly's attorney.

'How many Breadsticks have you eaten?'

"Say hello to my little friend!"

Winter lunch.

"It's not my fault he keeps forgetting to bring food to the potlucks."

'The hair in the soup provides fiber.'

Sick wife teaches husband to use can-opener

'Please, no - not the live fettucini!'

"The reason your meringue is crushed is because I distinctly heard you tell me to 'Step on it'."

'Do you do the squished up little balls that taste of fish - or are you the wrong ethnicity?'

'The thought of your biscuits brings a lump to my throat.'

The sea salt here is so authentic.

"The Normans are coming and I can't decide on whether to pour a simple consomme on them, or a more complex bisque."

"Eat your greens. . . and your pinks and yellows and blues."

Welcome at the Healthful Restaurant. We allow neither cholesterol, GM food, colourings, dust nor guests.