Frontier Adventurer Gifts

"You were the one who wanted to colonize another planet."

Fly Football

'I love our hideaway. I only wish we could find it.'

Polar Bear ice fishing through igloo.

"I still plan to be a cowboy when I grow up. If I'm going to service my share of the national debt, I might as well have fun doing it."

Revenge of the Jelly Mother.

Time Machine Collision

The Mouse King appears in the Nutcracker

"It isn't much of a dragon, but then, she wasn't much of a maiden."

"Where the wild things were."

"Hugh fans!"

'The pioneers opened the frontier, but it wasn't legal until brave lawyers blazed the paper trail!'

Golfer hanging from tree branch to play difficult shot.

Playground Pipe Dreams

School trip little porters.

Sleeping Beauty.

Bluesky helicopter evacuation from X

'Walter, stop fantasizing and get back to your desk.'

"Go ahead, tell him... Your friend is correct. Nuts are fruit. Why won't you ever believe me?"

"I'm not really sure what is weirder: that that bear did not maul us, or that he did hug us..."

"Time passes much more slowly in the other dimension, so take these sudokus."

Witch dice.

Astronaut

"Why do I hate religion? Imagine if half the money ever donated to religion had instead been used for scientific research. That's the world religion stole from me! Instead of worrying about the coronavirus, I could be slaying orcs on a starship's holodeck!"

The Four Horsemen of Trees: Beavers, Hammocks, Bugs, Unpainted Furniture.

"If you're my gramma you wouldn't have a problem consenting to a retina scan!"

Caution Dry Rot

'You know how you've always wanted to go on a balloon safari..?'

If you think that's good, you should see the Pork Sabre!

Sadly, the few who actually checked their e-mail, were too out of shape to run.

'Before handing out my punishment, please remember that I'm your hunting dog, and that you need me.'