French Fries Gifts

"I guess it's an OK job. Minimum wage plus all you can eat. I tried to quit once but couldn't get out the door."

"See? It never hurts to ask."

'I want to start a movement to remove little ketchup packets from fast food restaurants. I can't dunk my fries!'

You are what you eat.

Restaurant Francais: All you can pronounce £30.

"...But ASIDE from that, how was your trip to France?"

"Two burgers, two fries, two martinis—and we'll have those to go."

"I want some long, thin square ones - for chips..."

"All the butter was gone. There was no way out. The puff pastry had to be made with margarine... from a tub."

Paris' magnificent Trifle tower.

"It's okay dear. Dinner always tastes better when it's caught fresh, thrown back, taken from our cooler, removed from the package, and fried."

'Your stab at ordering the wine in French went well.'

Garlic Free Zone.

Grand Escargot at a Parisian Eatery.

"The prices they charge here, you'd expect them to have an oven not just a gas ring!"

"I think foie gras is French for endless buffet."

"Then again, an honest profile picture would not have got me a wonderful 'Duck Confit with a Chocolat Creme Brulee.'"

"Gigot de sept heures."

Cooking with Pierre

'Two famous French wines.' 'Red and white.'

"Oh, but we could be so good together...!"

''Romantic'? No -- but it makes me feel like having a CROISSANT!'

"We're actually going to grow potatoes on Mars!"

'My French is not so good.'

'Hey, Frenchie - you call this paupiettes de beouf aux legumes?'

'The Entrecote a la Bordelaise? It's stuff on a plate.'

"Our greatest fears are confirmed, they've taken waffle fries off the menu."

'Here's a good one, France on 2000 calories a day.'

If you give a mouse a French cookie: "And suddenly the memory returns. The taste was that of the little crumb of madeleine which on Sunday mornings at..."

"My bouche was not amused."

Culinary Culture.

"I love when you make asparagus soup!"

'The escargots are underdone.'

"My brain said, exercise....my tummy auto-corrected that to, extra-fries!"

"Our French chef just quit, so instead of the crepes you ordered, I made a breakfast burrito."